Mood Rantings

The good news is, almost all of the stress will be over in the next... week? week.5?

The bad news is... well you know... this week.5 is going to SUUUUCK.

I had to do a little exit interview thing for my loans (lest they hold my diploma). What I learned... nay... what slapped me across the face was that while picking the best payment plan, they give you a little budgeting calculator. So I filled out my estimates of what I'm going to make and what I'm going to spend. Turns out it takes me 7 tries to negotiate my finances before I stopped getting an error that said I was spending more than I was making. So essentially the federal government has helped me to understand how truly important ramen is going to be in my future. I feel like I'll be asking Santa for vitamins and nutrients for Christmas.

If anyone else asks me where I'm going to live, I am going to kill him or her (her)! And when I say that, I mean that I will make a joke about how I'm not ready to talk about it, but subsequently I will have a very angry imaginary conversation with that person. And given the nature of my guilt, I'll likely spend the next half hour imaginary-counseling myself about how I shouldn't direct my anger towards others when it is really just a reflection of my own frustration and, in addition, these questions really symbolize how much these people care about me.

Stupid predictable brain!

Trying to find an apartment is weird because it forces you to envision different versions of yourself based on the location and roommate. I went to visit an apartment last weekend (unsuccessful), but I knew that the roommate was an artist/musician/actor and she was in a picture in what seemed to be a meditating position. As a result, I was forced to envision a Blythe that joins in meditation and harmonizes in the midst of incense. I wore my Berkley tree earrings and my Arizona flee market jade turtle bracelet. Gotta dress the part. Also, I do not mean to imply that any of this was the reason the visit was unsuccessful. That was purely a parking situation.

On the other hand, I applied to a place in which the roommate was a 23 year old male from PA. That Blythe, I assess, would be much more giggly... amongst other things.... ...

On Sunday I visited the Magic Castle! This is a super exclusive magic establishment. You can't get in unless you are a member, which miraculously my professor is... and he took the few of us that wanted to go. I had to dress up-- coats and ties etc. Shmancy meals. But most importantly, this shit was MAGIC! Seriously! I couldn't even BELIEVE how crazy all the magic was! I've been saying this to everyone, but it isn't like you see ball and then they go behind a curtain and then whatever, it's magic. Nay. I was WAAAATCHING something in the magician's hand and it literally disappeared in front of my eyes. And we may be a little jaded to the use of doves and chicks... but how is it POSSIBLE to move a live animal under a cup without me noticing! It's real guys! Witches are amongst us.

My supervisor is leaving DANGEROUSLY soon! I already miss her and she's not even gone yet. I am super terrified, although I am also pretty excited-- mostly because I am pumped to have everything in my hands... people relying on me. Although I do kind of already feel that way, which is so wonderful. I am so grateful. Truly TRULY. I can say with COMPLETE honesty that I am a million times more excited about the production of this film than I am about graduating college or turning 22.

I got to listen to the tracks for our new Chords CD!!! Absolute heaven! Plus I showed my supervisor, who wants to buy some! And to be a little (a lot?) narcissistic, I am pretty pleased to have a reason to have people listen to me sing. I hate to even say that... but... singing is something that I'm more proud of than I'd care to admit, and I don't love when people don't know that about me.

More importantly, the album makes me miss Chords so much!

Even though I seem to be in a mood right now, I actually had a lovely last few weeks. I forgot to mention that I helped a lady jump start her car and... to make a long story short, we're essentially in love now. I saw her later and she hugged me like we were old friends. It was really lovely. You know how much I love strangers! Plus, I took a drive with the maintenance(?) guy... and we had such a lovely conversation for like... the hour+ that I was with him. I learned a lot about cheap fun places in LA (DEFINITELY not in a creepy way). These two encounters actually happened on the same day.

Also, something kind of awesome happened at CBS. But I can't tell you. Sorry. But I also get to go to a photo shoot tomorrow!

Grievances:

-Why won't my DVR record The Office!!?

-Stupid iPad that makes me feel conflicted about advertising, the bombardment of communication, and my curiosity vs. my desire to not be seduced by corporations or consumerism vs. my own pretentiousness about corporations and consumerism.

-How am I supposed to support my industry when a movie ticket costs $13.50?!

Lastly, look at this awesome snail that I saw on the ground!

I don't recall ever seeing a snail with a shell before!