All Riled Up

Now that the world (U.S.) is inundated with crazies, it's almost difficult to be enraged... because it'd take too long. When Barack Obama makes his joint congress speech correcting the lies that have been getting press despite the originators complete lack of authority on the subject, and then Sarah Palin goes on facebook the next day and writes that she still believes in death panels, how can you get upset? I mean, it's upsetting... but it's SOOO absurd that you can't argue with it. What would you say? "Based on what? BASED ON WHAT do you believe in death panels?!!! Based on nothing at all!! Based on your feelings? Did God tell you, you irresponsible, self-serving fucker!?" I'm just saying that you can't argue with crazies and it only serves to raise your blood pressure if you think about it too much.

But sometimes it all adds up. You hear about Palin. Kirk Cameron is crazily, but charismatically, handing out copies of Darwin's On the Origin of Species with a 50 page forward about how God actually made everything. Obama being pressured and backing down from the health care changes we NEEEEED!! (lest my generation be flooded from global warming, burned from the lack of ozone, dying of teflon cancer and all sleeping together in a huddled mass because we went bankrupt trying to get chemo)!

But, and I don't know why THIS sent me over the edge, but it did... I can't BELIEVE parents took their kids out of school because they didn't want them to hear the President speak. What the FUCK!?! I just want to know why I've been pressured into feeling like IIII have no patriotism because I think some countries have more ideal priorities when THIS bullshit happens! You don't do that! You don't train your children to be stubborn. To not listen to people. To think that the President's ideas are so dangerous that you get taken out of SCHOOL?! Fostering that kind of distrust! If I had kids I wouldn't even THINK of not letting them listen to Bush... especially because it's not like he would tell them to join the army... just like Obama's not going to tell them about health care. Those issues are controversial. He's just telling them to work hard and wash their hands!! I mean, especially when I think of how much those repubs seem to enjoy the idea of social standing and respect (to put them in a box)... you RESPECT your President... the way you respect an adult. We VOTED for him and too bad if you don't like it because maybe next time we'll vote for your guy.

Bill Maher posed what I think is a very interesting question. After we were attacked, democrats and republicans joined together because we were worried for our country together. We accepted, for a while, George Bush's plans. We trusted him. If we got attacked again, would republicans rally around Obama? I think the answer is no.

I HOPE these crazies are just getting disproportionate media coverage because crazy people are interesting. I HOPE that's the case. Although then we'll have to address the extreme irresponsibility of the media.

Damnit!

Cupcake Extraordinaire

My first test of the year is tomorrow. It's on health care and honestly... I feel like I've totally got it. I feel like it would PROBABLY be okay if I just showed up tomorrow without studying at all... although on a much more real level, it wouldn't be okay at all. But I HAVE been doing the readings and I HAVE been telling everything I know to anyone who will listen. Studying just seems so redundant right now. It's not a problem I face regularly.

In the name of procrastination, I would like to show you the most amazing looking cupcakes that one of the new Chords, Leanne, made.

Those purple swirly ones are completely rainbow inside. AWESOME!!! (If Claire reads this, the purple swirly ones would go GREAT with a Carnivale 2.0 party... which I think we should have in Las Vegas...)

Personal Late Night Dilemma and Pomegranate Advice

Ok having my TV back is both gold and... not-so gold. It's pyrite, if you will.

For one thing, having a TV can suck you into things you really don't want to watch and don't honestly have the time for. For instance, yesterday I watched Along Came Polly, which has to be my least favorite Ben Stiller movie, my least favorite Phillip Seymour Hoffman movie, and my least favorite Hank Azaria movie. To be fair, it isn't my least favorite of the Aniston flicks (She's Just Not That Into You, Rumor Has It) or my least favorite Debra Messing film (The Wedding Date). Still... the movie shouldn't be a temptation, yet simply existing seems to have been enough of a motivation for me to succumb.

ALTHOUGH, on the gold end, I almost died having to wait to watch Jon Stewart's interview with Rod Blagojevich.

Now since the summer, I've been watching my late night programs online. Because of CBS' lame website, I switched to Conan as being my primary late night talk show host of the 11:30-12:30 time slot (except I only watch the last half hour because Colbert trumps both). Well now that both Letterman and Conan are equal again (because I'm going to watch them on TV), which do I choose? I went to both of their sites and wrote down the guests for every day this week. With some simple math, I've come up with a good plan for each day.

(Conan on the left; Letterman on the right)

Monday: Drew Barrymore > Felicity Huffman = Conan

Tuesday: John Krasinski > Kelsey Grammer = Conan

Wednesday: Kate Walsh < madonna =" Letterman

Thursday: Michael Moore... =? Woody Harrelson = hard to say

Friday: Joshua Bell < david =" Letterman

Other information:

If you cut a pomegranate into 6 pieces and then put it under water in a bowl, you can EASILY get the seeds out. PLUS all of the peel floats to the top and the seeds sink to the bottom so you can skim the top of the water of all the peel and then drain the seeds in a colander. Then you've got all the seeds!! WAY better than picking them out of the peel individually, in my opinion.

PLUS, you can put the seeds into a bowl and mash the juice out by swishing the seeds with a glass. If you decide to put a pomegranate and a half of juice in a martini glass with 1.5 shots of vodka and a splash of lemonade, you get a pretty delicious drink. Then if you take a few sips and take a picture of it, I can only guess it might look something like this:

Worth it? Probably not (unless you get the pomegranates for free, which happened to be my fortunate circumstance at the time). Fun and delicious? HELL YEAH!

I'm Pretty Sure I Made the Right Choice.

Okay... now MAYBE you felt sympathy for me with my money predicament a few days ago. Now you won't.

Tonight I purchased a ticket to see Hanson (AHH!!) and a separate ticket to see David Cross (AHH!!). I KNOW I should save. And I will. But David Cross is my FAVORITE comedian and Hanson is my (secret) FAVORITE band! And what am I going to remember? My lousy $80? Trying to pack my school work into a smaller period of time? Nay. The last time I saw Hanson STILL might rank in my top 30 memories of life. How can I pass it up if I have the money? Shant.

Plus, I feel INFINITELY less guilty buying concert tickets than I do for a pair of pants or a TV or a crock pot. Spend my money on American skills and art-- no stuff.

I feel the same way about manicures.

Best Buy Miracle

On August 29 I brought my broken TV to the Best Buy to get it fixed.

On September 4th they called me saying that they were ordering parts and that they should receive the parts in 3 to 10 days.

On September 23rd I had still heard nothing about my TV so I decided to call and ask what's up. They said they would email the manufacturers and get back to me on why it's taking so long.

On September 26 they called me to tell me I could pick up a replacement TV.

I went down to pick it up and the TV I bought last year has

1. a lot more shit that comes with it and

2. is $40 cheaper

The miracle; I got refunded that $40 in cash!!

So I got paid $40 to get a new and better TV.

Sweet!!

Conversation with a Republican

MONEY OBTAINED!!!!!!!!!

And HOPEFULLY that's all I say about that for like... the next month at LEAST!

In other news, when I was at work, I had to go to the other SED building for some books. Since I was there, I decided to stop by and visit my old boss. She was lovely of course. Asked how I was doing. I mentioned that I'm taking a heath care sociology class and that I've gotten so nervous about health care that I had a nightmare about it. I also told her that right after the nightmare, I wrote my congressmen to say I wanted health reform (I got a response from Sestak today. That probably inspired this conversation).

WEEEELL... right as it was coming out of my mouth... seriously... the MOMENT I finished saying it, I remembered something unfortunate.

My old boss is a republican.

Shit.

Now, I'm a huge wimp, ESPECIALLY with authority figures, and I'm DEFINITELY not confrontational. What I'm saying is that I didn't tell her a single other opinion. So while she talked to me about the "hoodlums" in the senate for LITERALLY 45 minutes, I listened and nodded until she apparently ACTUALLY forgot why were discussing this in the first place. She attributed the beginning of our conversation to the fact that I was going to graduate this year. I'm THAT good at wimpiness.

Now, I hardly ever encounter republicans. And when I do, it's really a beautiful and enlightening thing because it reminds me about other opinions that can be or are equally valid. It reminds me that to stubbornly defend my opinions is hypocritical and useless. I can learn just as much, if not more, from people with opposite views.

That being said, I must say I was RELIEVED when she stated some clear fallacies (this taking into consideration that you never REALLY know anything...). I WANT to be open-minded... but I REALLY want health care reform and... it would hurt to have everything I know come crashing down (I know that I'm basically saying that I DON'T want to be open-minded... but... well it's a conflict of self interest--that's what I'm trying to admit). Anyway, these were my red flags:

1. She said that they were going to fund universal health care with the money from medicare. Well... Obama SPECIFICALLY said that they would NOT use that money. I mean... medicare doesn't even HAVE money. Plus... if we went into a single payer system or a public option, wouldn't that essentially mean that all health care was the same as medicare? It would mean everyone is covered, not just old people.

2. She said that she didn't want to give up her current doctor and coverage.

Obama, again, SPECIFICALLY stated that if you like your current plan, you will absolutely not have to change it. Although, I can see how there could be some contention. I imagine that the insurance companies will have trouble competing with a public option... assuming the public option will be able to really get young people to join. That being said, a doctor isn't going to stop being a doctor. If you see a general practitioner, a public option would just mean that a different sort of insurance would be paying the doctor.

3. She said that we already cover everyone with the use of hospitals.

Two things are ... narrow-minded about this, according to what I've learned.

A) People with insurance pay for those people. What happens is that when someone comes in to the hospital with a big emergency like a heart attack or they are in labor, the hospital has to take them. However, the hospital can't pay for them and they end up "cost shifting" (sounds illegal to me, but it's true) to everyone else. So everyone with insurance essentially pays part of the poor person's bill. But... it doesn't matter to them because the insurance is paying. But the insurance companies lose more money on that (obvs) and it eventually leads to higher premiums for everyone else.

B) A lot of emergencies can be prevented with regular check ups and that is much less expensive... not to mention much better physically and emotionally for the person. Basically, doctors, I THINK, aren't just there for when you're about to die. That's why we have check ups... catch that cancer.

4. She also said that she's a firm Catholic and she doesn't want abortions to be funded with her money. She said that the senators don't read the 1000 page bill and who knows what's going to be in it. I agree that the senators don't seem to have really read the bill. But I DO know that Obama SPECIFICALLY said that the money will not fund abortions.

5. This part is the part that I can't argue really. She's from Italy and she says that the people from Italy don't think their socialized health care is good. She said that most of their hospitals aren't open at night, so if they have an emergency, they have to travel really far. She also said that the Canadians don't like their system. I can't say anything about that as I am neither Italian nor Canadian. She finished off this thought by saying that our health care is the best there is, even if it has some problems.

I asked her if she watched Obama's joint congress address and she said yes. Although, not to be an ass, don't think she watched it that carefully because a LOT of her contentions were things that Obama addressed specifically as not being true.

So like I said, I really feel like I SHOULD be open-minded. I am 21-years-old and have little to no life experience. I am in a pool of liberals with EXTREME liberal information thrown at me all the time... which I know is propaganda in itself. In fact, even when I'm in my health care class, I look at all the statistics and I think of how easily statistics can be either false or incredibly manipulative. It seems like a lot of the reason that I believe my professor is because I WANT to believe her. That said, after this conversation with a 60-ish year old "independent" (with obvious republican leanings) while at least being AWARE that I should have an open mind and TRYING to see her side of the matter(which seems like the best that I can do), I still fully believe that health reform is absolutely necessary.

Reduced Pay

Yesterday I found $.51 on the ground.

My financial assistance from the heavens got substantially reduced, it seems. Nevertheless, I'm grateful. I'm that much closer to doing my laundry....

Money Issues That I Can Complain About

I'm seriously going to stop talking about money the SECOND it stops being my main cause of anxiety. Seriously SERIOUSLY! And I'm super pissed about it because I don't really believe this to be my fault anymore.

I started working for Hillel on Sept. 3 and since then I've literally worked 29 hours for Hillel alone (and 43 hours if you add SED). Why don't I have any money on Sept 21?! And some of these problems should be solved. For instance, it took him (my boss) about 100 years to put my name into the computer. Obviously I don't know what that process involves, and maybe I should give him the benefit of the doubt, but I only filled out one side of a sheet of paper... so how much more could he have to do?

Also, I've just been handing him my hours on a sheet of paper. I asked him on the first day if I should punch in and he said no because I wasn't in the computer yet. Fine. Three shifts (a week) later I asked him if it was time yet. No, still not in the computer. Even though at this point I believe it is HIS job to tell me when I'm in the computer, I ask again last Thursday. Yes, he says. I should have been swiping in.

!!!! I'm going to die of fury! (that is an exaggeration)!

So fine. I accept that my Hillel boss is inept (yes. I WILL be that harsh!). BUUUT SED (my other job) is not. I started SED in the middle of the week about 2 weeks ago. I worked 4 hours, which would be about $30, which isn't much... but it'll get me through a week. On Friday, I went to SED to pick up this check. It wasn't there! The lady looked for it on the computer for me. If you work in two places at the University, they only give you one check for both jobs. My check has been sent to the Hillel!

NOOOO!!

I asked her if she could have my check directed to SED for next time, which she did. That doesn't really help now though. It only gives me comfort that next Friday I should have the 10 hours of money I earned from SED last week... which is actually quite a comfort.

The EASILY most annoying part about that was that I asked my Hillel manager about it. At the time that I filled out my employment paper, I said I wanted my to pick up my check at Hillel because I wasn't sure I was still working for SED. The day after I found out I'd be working for SED again, I asked him specifically if I could have my checks sent there. "They probably will already go there," he said.

MOTHER OF CRAP!

On Saturday, I tentatively told him that my SED check had been sent to the Hillel. He told me he would look for it in the office on Monday. I am never getting that check.

Now it WOULD seem that I'm being dramatic. I GUESS I am. But actually... I'm not really. I had $500 worth of points that I could spend at whatever location on campus, essentially. I spent $300 on books and I've spent the other $200 on various things already... since I've only had $50 for the past... however long. So now I have exactly $.97 in points. And I have exactly $3.76 in my checking account and $.48 in my savings. I have a half a bag of spaghetti and a half a jar of sauce. I have several cans of tuna and I get sandwiches on Tuesday and Thursday from the Hillel. Today I went to the dining hall and stole as much food as I could.

Fine. I'll make it through a week. But the issue I have right now is that I have to print out 3 scripts and a semi-paper thing for Wednesday. The scripts are about 50 pages each and I no longer have a quota (the University lowered the quota from 500 pages (with the option to request more) to 100 pages, which I went through with one homework assignment). Two scripts cost me $7.30 last week. I also have to print out a piece of music for Tuesday.

I don't know what I'm going to do, although I have some ideas.

I am angry about money, and for the first time in months, I'm not angry at myself.

Papi

I was browsing my dad's facebook and found...

I love my dad.

Emile Hirsch

JESUS H!

Into the Wild....

I'll tell you there is an Emile Hirsch movie for my every temperament. He makes windows to my soul at the exact pace that my brain thinks of them! Whatever I'm thinking about, he's already made the film that understands it, delves deeper into it, and shows me the outcome.

I LOVE EMILE HIRSCH.

And I LOVE Into the Wild!

(And Imaginary Heroes, The Secret Lives of Alter Boys, Milk, Lords of Dogtown, Alpha Dog, probably Taking Woodstock (when I see it)...)

And I LOVE that it speaks to me right when I need to hear it!

Too bad he doesn't share my enthusiasm for late night talk shows because he doesn't seem to have been a guest on any of them.

Four Parts and the Longest One is About TV...

I guess fortunately (?) my life has reached such a momentum that I can no longer write everything I do, despite what seemed to be my insatiable need to record all of my own dull doings. So, I will break it (my life) into parts and see what happens:

Part 1: Blythe-specific Selective Media Coverage (if you loosely define "media coverage")

The Daily Show and The Colbert Report are back. Thank god! Even the few things that I actually saw on my own (without their coaxing) were infinitely funnier and more illuminating when they showed it to me.

The Office is also back!!! (YEEESS!!!!!) I thought the first episode was great, which is a good sign because I had awfully high expectations.

Right afterwards was the new show Community, which seemed a little offensive about community colleges... but it seemed funny enough. I only watched until the first commercial because ... I guess it didn't capture me enough. BUT John Oliver, one of my favorite Daily Show correspondents, was a main character. The real question is where is this Community going to go when 30 Rock comes after it's time-slot on October 15th? Also, I do NOT have faith in Parks and Recreations.

On the radio front, I HIGHLY recommend subscribing to the free podcast of This American Life... although I wouldn't hold anyone against not doing it because... I don't know anyone who really has the time to listen to an hour of radio. But if you DO have the time... or a long drive or something... pretty much every episode inspires me or illuminates something for me or makes me rethink or recognize the complexity of things I thought I knew. It's just pure gold. Plus David Sedaris sometimes contributes!

Also, I STILL haven't used my free movie pass. The one that I had back when I decided I was going to use it on 500 Days of Summer. And then I was going to see Inglourious Basterds. And then Extract. Bah!

Lastly, if you know me at all, you know that I watch like... a billion interviews per day. Well I PARTICULARLY enjoyed Matt Damon on Letterman the other day. The entire interview was gold, but as I couldn't find the entire thing as an isolated clip, I would at least recommend watching the best part. If you want to watch the whole thing, you can find it on cbs.com. Just find the interview and then move the marker right on top of the commercial line that looks closest to the middle (I don't know why I'm explaining when I know that no one will do it).

Part 2: Work

I LOVE working at SED! I've caught up on my Real Time with Bill Maher and I'm going through my This American Life. Hillel is fine and easy too. Today I decided to not shower right away so that I could shower AFTER I have to wear the visor. What I'd like most from these places, though, is to get paid. I'm getting to be QUITE poor again (thank god for my god money).

Part 3: Anecdote

Today when I got to work, Sandy, the woman who sets up the station and who I now know is from Hong Kong (she also has an accent) was there. I'm OBSESSED with her! Well today when she was leaving to go upstairs, she stopped to tell me what the muffin flavors were today:

Sandy: We have banana nut and cheepo

Blythe: Cheepo?

Sandy: Yes cheepo. They have cranberries, blueberries, and one other kind.

Blythe: Okay thanks.

About 15 minutes later, Ben, a regular customer (and friend of Rachael's) comes over.

Ben: Can I have a muffin?

Blythe: Sure. We have banana nut and what Sandy told me was a "cheepo" muffin. It has cranberries, blueberries, and one other kind of berry.

:::pause:::

Ben: I think she meant "triple."

How embarrassing!! I'm so glad he pointed that out to me before I spent the whole day calling them "cheepo" muffins (/I'm definitely always going to call berry muffins "cheepo" in my head.)

Part 4: Let's Wrap it Up

This girl that I thought was the funniest girl in my old TV writing class transferred into my new one. I tried to downplay my excitement but she wrote a GREAT episode of Seinfeld last year and I am PUMPED to see what she comes up with this year!! She's also reeeaaally nice. So... awesome (/I'm a creep).

We post our final list of girls for Chords tomorrow at 8am. I hope they choose us!!!!

Obama on Kanye

I kind of assume this might be taken off line soon, but please listen to Obama's off-the-record comment about Kanye.

It gave me a thrill like a little girl! I can't help it!

New Rules

Some good words from Bill Maher:

And finally, new rule; not everything in America has to make a profit.

You know if conservatives get to call universal health care socialized medicine, I get to call private, for-profit health care soulless vampire bastards making money off human pain. Now I know what you're thinking, "But Bill the profit motive is what sustains capitalism." Yes. And our sex-drive is what sustains the human species but we don't try to fuck everything. It's okay for some things to remain non-profit, just like when it comes to sexual relations, some people are off limits... like your cousin or your sister or if you're a leading republican, your wife.

Now it wasn't that long ago that when a kid in a America broke his leg his parents took him to the local Catholic hospital, the nun stuck a thermometer in his ass, the doctor slapped some plaster on his ankle and you were done. The bill was $1.50, plus you got to keep the thermometer. But like everything else that's good and noble in life, some bean-counter decided that hospitals could also be big business. So now they're not hospitals anymore. They're Jiffy Lubes with bed pans. The more people who get sick and stay sick, the higher they're profit margin is... which is why they're always pushing the jello.

Did you know that the United States is ranked 50th in the world in life expectancy? And the 49 loser countries where they live longer than us, oh it's hardly worth it. They may live longer but they live shackled to the tyranny of non-profit health care. Here in America, you're not coughing up blood, little Bobby, you're coughing up freedom. The problem with President Obama's health care plan isn't socialism. It's capitalism. When did the profit motive become the only reason to do anything? When did that become the new patriotism? Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's in it for Blue Cross/ Blue Shield.

It's not just medicine. Prisons also used to be a non-profit thing. And for good reason. Who the hell wants to own a prison? By definition you're going to have trouble with the tenants. It is not a coincidence that we outsourced running prisons to private corporations and then the number of prisoners in America skyrocketed.

There used to be some things we just didn't do for money. Did you know, for example, that there was a time when being called a "war-profiteer" was a bad thing? FDR said he didn't want WWII to create one millionaire. But I'm guessing Iraq has made more than a few executives and Halliburton into millionaires. Halliburton sold soldiers soda for $7.50 a can. They were honoring 9/11 by charging like 7 Eleven. Which is wrong. We're Americans. We do not fight wars for money. We fight them for oil.

And my final example of the profit motives screwing something up that used to be good when it was non-profit: TV news. I heard all the news anchors this week talk about how much better the news coverage was back in Cronkite's day. And I thought, "Gee, if only you were in a position to do something about it." But maybe they aren't. Because this isn't Cronkite's day, when delivering the news was considered a lost leader and a civic duty. Making money was the job of The Beverly Hillbillies. And now that we have reporters moving to Alaska and hanging out with the Palin family, the news is the Beverly Hillbillies

God Couldn't Think of a Good Gift So He Went with the Old Standby

I got a check for $50 in the mail today and I have no idea where it's from... but it says it's from being a part of some research. However, I'm pretty sure I already got paid for all of my research participations. But whatever, I was SOO thankful! I went to deposit the money and saw that I only had $1 left in my account! And I thought I had $10!! Thus... I consider it a check directly from god.

More for Reform

Today I decided to write to my senators and congress guy about health care reform. It was pretty cathartic and of course I urge you to do the same if the mood strikes you. Also, I'm not sure how casual you're supposed to be in your letters to congress, but I figure they MUST get tons of emails from people who sound as stupid or stupider than I.

Here's my letter:

Dear Senator Arlen Spector,

My name is Blythe Wolber and I am twenty-one years old. I am writing to implore you to vote for President Obama’s health reform.

My entire family has always had quality health insurance because my parents are young nurses. Until recently, I never realized our country had a health care crisis. Now that I do, I am frightened by my generation’s future. I am going to graduate college in the spring and I know that I am likely going to have no insurance for several years. I know that if anything terrible happens, my parents may go bankrupt in order to help me. I know that if I develop a condition, I may not know about it for several years, giving it a chance to worsen until it becomes a terrible burden financially and physically.

More importantly, I am a part of a generation of people that assume we will get cancer at some point in our lives, an assumption that I consider reasonable. I feel like I learn about a new cancer-causing agent every few weeks-- teflon, vaseline, nutrasweet, bottled water, deodorant, hormones in milk, most cleaning substances. The list goes on forever. It will take a long time for us to track down everything that gives us cancer, even longer to make everyone know about it, and even longer to actually diminish the use of these things. After all, we’ve known about the effects of cigarettes for decades, yet at this moment we are still imposing new laws to diminish their effects on the public. That’s not even counting the sun, who’s presence every morning is partially beautiful and partially a daily reminder of the gloom it will be imposing on my near future.

The point is that if most of my generation gets cancer in the next twenty years, and nearly 20% of us have no insurance, that will be millions of people who have no way of catching their cancer early. They will go to the hospital when their symptoms are so overt and any doctor they see will know that they have no chance. Nevertheless, they will have to try and save these people using incredibly expensive procedures that won’t even work most of the time. The hospitals will then cost shift all the bills of the deceased to the people in the hospital who do have insurance. The insurance company will pay the bill but raise premiums to make up for their loss. When premiums raise, health care becomes more of a burden to people and almost more importantly, more healthy people refuse to enter the system because they don’t think they can afford it, thus taking money from the system and placing that burden on the sick-- a vicious, terrible cycle. That doesn’t even include the millions of people who’s health insurance won’t cover them when they get sick, an incredible scandal that makes me ashamed of my country.

I know that the death panel rumor was crazy and completely false, but I honestly believe that the reality is even more frightening. I would rather know that as a senior citizen I would have to defend my life in front of a panel, then live through my seemingly doomed near future that I just described. Plus, my generation is already going to have to live through the effects of global warming. Give us a chance.

I am positive that health reform will happen at some point. I see no other way for our nation to go on. Please help make this happen sooner than later. Please brighten my future and allow my nightmares to go back to alligators under my bed instead of my parents losing their health insurance.

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

Blythe Wolber

Also, if you didn't watch Obama's health reform congress speech... it was pretty great. Consider yourself urged.

Unaccountable Taste and Dirty Money

I have to see Extract. Both Jimmy Fallon AND Letterman were RAVING about it for like... a year and a half. Tomorrow.

Also, this was last week or something, but I posed the question to someone about why THE Final Destination was doing so well. 3D! I forgot about that surprisingly weighty new element to movies. I think I might piss my pants if I saw that in 3D... so I can see the appeal.

Glee got great ratings, which was especially impressive because that's when Obama did his big health care address. Plus everyone talks about the show. At the Hillel, these girls talked for like... a half hour about where they were going to watch it. Plus my a cappella friends are obsessed... which makes sense because it's about a cappella... but even my TV friend whose taste I trust, Stephanie, recommended it to me. I watched it! I don't get it!

I watched Death to Smoochy last night. It was PRETTY good... but I'm pretty sure I'll never have to see it again. I liked the message and satire more than the movie itself. I MORE enjoyed watching it and then going on thedailyshow.com and watching Jon Stewart interview all of the people that were in the movie. It reaffirmed all of my feelings about all of the actors. Loves the Ed Norton, Danny DeVito is fun as hell, and Robin Williams has so much god damn energy that IIII need to take a nap per every 10 minutes he talks.

Last night, when I was getting out of bed for something... I don't know what happened exactly but I caught my big toe nail on my ankle. But the (more) mysterious part is, while my toe nail is incredibly strong and my ankle skin is relatively weak, I did not break the skin on my ankle but my big toe nail broke half way down and started bleeding quite a bit! I just wonder how that's possible. I imagine it was some magic angle at which the nail hit my ankle... the only angle that would cause the nail to break instead of the skin. Or maybe this isn't interesting at all. Regardless, I didn't know what to do about the toe, so I taped it with medical tape and I haven't looked at it again. I imagine I'm currently susceptible to foot diseases.

Also, I forgot to mention that I now have to wear a visor at Hillel... which sucks because now I have to really think about when I'm going to take a shower every day to minimize how long I have to go around with flat hair from the visor. My question is, do visors even help? Because I was already wearing my hair back and it's not like you shed from the top of your head.

The reason for the visor is the health inspector lady came. Everything was okay. Buuut, what I've been doing is wearing plastic gloves to make food and then whenever I touch money, I take the gloves off and put new gloves on... which in my opinion is excessive and pretty wasteful. I essentially use different gloves for every customer... and the trash can largely consists of "used" gloves. Whatever, I get it. But the health inspector lady told me that I should wear gloves when I make the food, take them off to work with the money, WASH MY HANDS, and then put more gloves on. She was like, "you see you hands get contaminated when you touch the dirty money and then you touch the clean gloves, which contaminates them-- just another way of looking at it."

I REAAALLLY wanted to say "how dirty is it?" in a suggestive manner. Nevertheless, I'm not actually going to do that because it would dry my hands out. I already have to use lotion EVERY TIME I wash my hands... and even sometimes when I don't because I FREQUENTLY (like... 15 times a day, literally) feel like my hands are too dry. I actually don't know how the compulsion started... because I've only been doing it for like... 1.5 years but it doesn't seem like something that's going to go away for me. And I'm not sad about it because it will just keep my hands smooth longer. The rest of my skin will shrivel up over the years, but my hands might remain silky. Regardless, I simply cannot wash my hands 25 times in 4 hours. Although I don't want to deliberately breaks rules just because I think it's incredibly stupid. I NEVER wash my hands before meals and I'm positive that I haven't gotten sick once from that. And I'm sure I've touched dirtier things than money before sticking my fingers right in my mouth. I don't care. I hardly get sick at all. Plus it strengthens your immune system.

ANYWAY, I'm just going to wear my dirty gloves when I touch the dirty money and then my hands will only be touching new clean gloves and nothing else. Problem solved. Hay day for plastic glove companies and anti-bacterial soap, though (as always).

Bragging About My Life (Sorry) with a Side of Cellphone Complaint

Life is going GREAT so far!!

Yesterday/Tuesdays in general, according to my schedule, look the roughest. I have work from 9am-1pm, then class from 2pm to 6pm (but really 5:30pm most of the time) and Chords from 7pm-10pm (except yesterday when I had to be there at 6:30pm).

ANYWAY, that is a LOOONG day! Except that it really wasn't. Hillel is SO un-taxing that I mostly read for my homework the whole time. And what did I read? Scripts of Two and a Half Men and 30 Rock. Then I had a free sandwich and off to film class.

This was my first film discussion and my teacher wanted to do getting-to-know-you exercises, which in my opinion cause WWAAAAYYY more anxiety than they alleviate. In fact, I don't think they EVER alleviate anxiety. I'm not sure why professors (or TAs in this case) do it.

BUUUUUUUT you know how we did it in this class?! We got in groups of three and we had to pick out three movies that would be on all of our top ten movie list!!!

!!!!!!!!

THAT IS MY FAVORITE THING TO DISCUSS WITH STRANGERS!!! Particularly strangers who love movies!!

AAAAAND!!!!!

We picked The Princess Bride (!!!), American Beauty (!!), and Wall-e (which wouldn't REALLY make my top ten... but... obviously we needed a little give, and it was perfectly acceptable).

AAAAAAAAND!!! (can there even BE an "and"!!?)

My class' favorites as a whole were The Princess Bride (!!!!!!!!), American Beauty (!!), and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind!

GOLD!! We even filled out little cards and put our own personal top five movies on that! This is where I want to be!!

Then we watched some old movies and discussed. It's really about learning the best film-story technique right now... so it's not too noteworthy what the movies were. Regardless, in the future we're basically watching a movie and then discussing it at the end. That is what the 3.5-4 hours will make up.

And THEN I get to sing. Or in this case, listen to people try out, which ... you can use your imagination to think of how fun that is (QUITE fun).

Plus today, in my TV writing class, we voted to write our class script (which we're doing BEFORE individual ones) on The Office!!!!

And today we watched an episode of South Park in class. South Park is hilarious as it is, but I think it's ESPECIALLY hilarious when you watch it in class. AAAND when you have to talk about it. For instance, here is a direct quote from my professor:

"So we talked about the story of one little kid masturbating a dog escalating into..."

I know I'm getting into my brag-y self again... but it's MUUUCH better than the downer I've been more recently. At least for me it is.

Here's something though. Yesterday I read a lot of scary health care things and then I told them to Elena later in the night. Presumably as a consequence, I had nightmares about my mom losing her health care.

Also, I had to buy deodorant for the first time in literally years. I'd obtained so much from various places but I've finally run out.

Also, this isn't relevant to today or this week or anything, but I would like to reflect on how depressed (yes, depressed) cellphones make me. I'm not TRRYYYYING to be a butt (I say that so much... on some level I'm sure I am trying to be a butt), but I HATE that you can't talk to ANYONE without them being distracted by their phone. I hate it because it's alREADY hard to make a connection with someone. But then they get a text. And MOST people look at it... but they insist that you keep talking or THEY try to keep talking but you know they aren't thinking about your conversation anymore. And then they smile and ask "what was I talking about?" and in my head I'm like "fuck you. I don't give a shit anymore!" because you know that whatever the text was was completely useless and I just think the person with you should get your attention.

I only like actually talking to a few people anyway... but I think it's more of a depressing notion. I can't even talk to my MOM without her getting distracted. That's why grandpas are awesome. But I ESPECIALLY despise when people pick up their calls... which only a FEW people still haven't realized is like... the least cool thing ever. Some people do it in the middle of THEIR sentence!! And some people don't even give you a warning.

Actually the worst thing is that I can't say anything about it. I'm pretty sure I'd be less offended, especially in the case of answering the phone mid sentence, if the person slapped me across the face.... but if you got noticeably upset, you'd look completely crazy and irrational.

Buuuut... I had a great day today!!

David Letterman said Extract was brilliant.... so maybe I'll check that out.

Big Bang Toast

Well I went crazy again and only have seven more episodes to watch before I finish the entire series of The Big Bang Theory. Thankfully it's only two seasons long so... while I clearly have some sort of a problem, I haven't given up my life completely...

On the bright side, it's now another choice for my final project for my TV writing class. PLUS, it's apparently the highest rated sitcom behind Two and Half Men (if I understood correctly) and it's a young show so it'll probably be around for a while after I graduate... all of this according to my professor... not my own observations.

Today I got a lot done before I realized that we don't have class tomorrow. Then I abruptly stopped. Oh well...

(If you can't figure out what happened to the rest of my day, refer to paragraph one.)

Here's one glorious thing. I obtained the new toaster-- the one that I didn't find on public ground. And it makes PERFECT toast!!! Breakfast just got infinitely more lovely! Peanut butter toast! Eggs and toast! Toasty turkey sandwiches... or dare I try making my own lovely, toasty CLUB sandwiches!?!! And if I run out of money again, there's nothing wrong with a little plain buttered toast. Did I mention that this toaster toasts BAGELS?! It even has a special setting for FROZEN bagels!!

Joni Mitchell, Hillel, Hair, Other Uselessness...

Before I start... You know when you know something could likely be good or interesting but it looks or sounds so SO boring that you either aren't going to see or hear it OR it's going to take a lot of will power to see or hear it? Ok, to my knowledge, it's a common situation with no single word to describe it. Now, Kevin and I used to use "Joni Mitchell" as the description. For example:

Person A: Are you going to see Paul Revere's house?

Person B: eh... I don't know. It's pretty Joni Mitchell.

This isn't to say anything bad about the actual Joni Mitchell. At the time we came up with the phrase (and subsequent list of Joni Mitchell things), we felt like we SHOULD listen to Joni Mitchell but... it was too Joni Mitchell. Since then, I have grown very fond of Joni Mitchell, particularly the songs "Little Green," "River," and "Carey." Also, Bob Dylan really likes Joni Mitchell. Regardless, I need this to be part of my blogging vocabulary.

Pressing on... I saw a new trailer for The Open Road starring Jeff Bridges and Justin Timberlake, who I think is a WONDERFUL actor, but I concede that I could just be seduced by his charm and charisma... although in my opinion, that's about 75% of acting. It does look a little JONI MITCHELL though. Also, it looks like Justin's less cute-and-funny-teen version of Crossroads.... and there are parents involved.

I had my first day at the Hillel dining hall (as opposed to the cafe, where I started on Thursday). It was lovely. I worked with two boys, which made me very shy... so I'm going to have to try to speak more next time. But also, I enjoyed watching how they interact with me as "the girl"-- where they drew the line on everything. For instance, they didn't seem to have a problem talking about strippers, but they wouldn't look me in the eye while doing it. Also, their voices became gentler when directing their speech to me.

Here is something glorious for me (relatively speaking) that I noticed. On Monday, Wednesday and Friday, I start the day with class which begins at 10am, which I think is the earliest that my brain is fully functioning. BUUUT on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I start the day with (largely non-interactive) work at 9am... which is fine because I don't NEED to have a fully functioning brain yet. Then on Saturday I start work at 10am... which is a LITTLE sucky... but it IS interactive and also a good way to get up on a Saturday.

And for something unrelated (as all of these things are), part of my homework was to familiarize myself with these 4 shows:

1. Two and a Half Men

2. The Office

3. 30 Rock

4. The Big Bang Theory

(Being a television major is AWESOME... I do have other things too though... because all majors require work!)

I obviously know The Office and 30 Rock, but I watched several episodes of the other two. Not bad. I particularly like The Big Bang Theory because Leonard is David from Roseanne (my favorite character)... which I already knew, but what I DIDN'T know was that Sara Gilbert, Darlene from Roseanne, is a regular character too!! Fun!

Lastly, Elena and Matt went to see a Boston taping of Wheel of Fortune! I can't WAIT to hear what it was like!

Double lastly, how could THE Final Destination (why did we need a "the?"), aka: Final Destination 4, reach the top of the box office??!! And without any Devon Sawa!! I just don't understand! I'm inclined to blame the recent series of films with bad lady hair:

(Bullock in All About Steve)

(Adams in Julie and Julia)

You may say that's just two films... I say two's enough to do some damage! People are growing confused and they want to see death follow some beautiful people around.

(I'm really kidding though. I think we need more leads with less attractive hair so we can start relaxing some standards here. I think Adams should grow some armpit hair... help her sisters out a bit).

(but actually not-- I'm not that liberated.)

(yet...)

:::dramatic music swell:::

Job Security and Class

Glorious glorious glorious!

First of all, the Hillel job is pie. Plus, I make sandwiches during the job (but only 2 kinds of sandwiches-- lox and tuna) but MAYBE this will be able to count as some kind of food services job in the future if I need to be a waitress. Mostly it's nice because it isn't terribly busy. I got through a LOT of my Colbert book re-read, which will hopefully be replaced with a book of more academic use in the future (I didn't realize I would be able to read and thus wasn't prepared).

Also, while I'm speaking of work, I DID get my SED job back (it was questionable before because I thought I was too busy for them to take me). Soooo I'm working either 21 or 22 hours a week this year (questionable because I know I'm starting at 10am at Hillel on Saturday but I DON'T know when I'm ending... I didn't think to ask. I imagine 1 or 2pm)!! WHOOO! I haven't had money in so long (my fault, my fault, I know, I know, I know, I know!). Elena informs me that she thinks this is going to be stressful... but I don't think so. Or maybe I'm just greedy about the moneys.

ANYWAY, my classes seem kick ass!

TV writing: My professor has an INTENSE career! If you look up Michael Loman on imbd.com, you'll see what I mean. He's very kind and not scary at all, though. Also, he's my professor for my television comedy (sans writing), which I haven't had yet, but... I assume they'll be similarly awesome. PLUS I get to write a script on my own as a final project and it can be whatever running sitcom I want. YES!!

Health care sociology: When I signed up for the course, I thought I would enjoy it because it's so timely. NOW I see that I'm so fortunate to take the class while we have a strong hope for change. When I left the class, I a LITTLE wanted to kill myself over our current health care situation. I'll probably (hopefully) write out the stuff I think is important. Crazy stuff here.

Art and literature of film: AWESOME!! Basically we watch a movie on Tuesdays. Then right after we discuss it. Then on Thursday we have a lecture about it. Then Friday is an optional re-screening of the movie from Tuesday. Two things are great about that:

1. It's GREAT that they accommodate for wanting to watch a movie twice. On a big screen!

2. That's 2.5 hours on a Friday that I don't have to go to... which makes it easier for me to decide to take a trip... to Penn State, perhaps? Yes!

Also, we're not really starting the novels yet, but they're going to quiz us on the novels, which is nice because it'll make me actually read them. They aren't that long, so I don't think it'll get to be too much.

Some other semi-interesting things:

1. My friend Nora and I were walking home from Julia's (west) at 1am and we saw this guy screaming at a girl in a really scary way for a long time. We thought, maybe it'll be fine, but on the off chance that something happens, it would never escape our conscience's. So I called the police and we watched as two police cars came and took them both away. It couldn't have taken more than a minute from the time I placed the call. I hadn't even hung up before the first police car got there. Awesome. After wards we basically kissed each other's ass, telling each other what good samaritans we are. We were pretty pleased with ourselves.

2. I watched Pumpkin. When I started it I was like "oh god, this is the worst movie ever!" And then as it progressed I was like "wait... this really IS the worst movie... in a good way." I think it was intentional.. in which case, it's pretty funny. I guess it's kind of in the realm of But I'm a Cheerleader... which I do like.

3. New season of The Office starts Sept. 17 at 9pm. PUUUUMPED!! It starts in real time with Pam four months pregnant!

A Wee Obama Plug

Just THINK about donating to the Obama health care campaign. After all, we'd rather him ask us for the money instead of lobbyists who will ask for their agenda to be put in the bill. And if everyone gives $5...

Gods' Shout-Out

Usually I don't have a hard time sleeping, but last night I actually laid in bed in the dark for hours with either no sleep or very restless sleep (you know when you can't really tell... I have to assume I was at least partially asleep). Plus I woke up like... 3 times to pee, which is also not the usual for me. I guess it was first day of class jitters, which I didn't even realize I had. But it was good because it wasn't difficult at all for me to get up at 9am.

Yesterday I decided to get my books, mostly because I have guitar today, the only class I ASSUME I'm going to need the book for on the first day. Unfortunately that was the only book that wasn't there. But at least I tried. BUUUUUT two glorious things occurred:

1. My only book for TV writing was a book that I previously had for another class. The miracle is that I STILL have it!! I get rid of MOST of my books. So... I think that was a shout-out from the gods.

2. Since I dropped my other scary literature class (where I needed to read The Odyssey and Portrait of an Artist BEFORE class even STARTED!! (ah!!)), I didn't check to see what books we would be reading for my new choice, art and literature of film. Weeeell, I'm pleased to announce that the books are Frankenstein, Basic Kafka, selected tales from Edgar Allen Poe, Miss Lonely Hearts/Day of Locust (?), and a textbook called Understanding Movies, which has Spiderman on the cover (which will make me look mighty intellectual). I'm SOOO pleased because I'll still be getting some classic literature, but the odds that I'll read Frankenstein are a MILLION times better than the odds that I would have read The Odyssey!!

In other news, I went through my netflix queue to put movies I really want to see at the top of the list (an act I practice every so often), buuuuut I forgot to put them in order of how I actually want to receive them... so I'm getting Pumpkin today... which I DID want to see, but not in the same way that I wanted to see Into the Wild or Death to Smoochy. Oh well.

Also, Elena and I found a 4-slot toaster in our vestibule-- basically my dream. I fantasize about peanut butter toast breakfasts. However, the toaster is temperamental, not surprising given it's abandoned state when we found it. My fantasies WOULD be ruined, but lovely Corina is giving me a toaster. I'm taking this to mean that the same gods who saved me from buying an extra book must really want me to have toast this year. I accept!

Also, the cast of Seinfeld is doing a semi-reunion on Curb Your Enthusiasm. The plot is going to be for 5 episodes, three of which will have the entire cast. They'll be kind of playing themselves but the plot is that they are creating a reunion show, so you'll get to see scenes from the fictional reunion show... so basically in some parts they will be playing their Seinfeld characters. Pretty cool! Although... I don't get HBO.

Also, I watched the most recent episode of Weeds yesterday (it was THRILLING), only to learn that it was the SEASON FINALE! BAAAH!! No Weeds!! No Office!! No Daily Show or Colbert Report!! What am I going to do with myself??!!

I hear Greek is good...

I think Glee is starting again, except I watched the pilot and I didn't see what the fuss was about.

I guess I'll have to go back to movies for a while. Or do my homework...

BUSAAAY!

I forget how busy life is (I know that sounds like... some sort of flat exaggerated open-liner... but I am SERIOUS!)!!! A jillion people to see, a jillion things to do, and a jillion places to be. It's overwhelming!

In fact, I can't even list everything I've done every day (thank god for you) because there's too much (or more likely, my brain has lost the ability to retain even slightly large pieces of information). I'll just give you an example instead.

Yesterday I got up to go to Splash (the activities fair thing... the main attraction, in my opinion, was the hamburgers, which I talked about excessively up until the point where one was in my mouth... oh and also to promote Chords and get people to audition). I was intending on being at the Starbucks outside at 9:40am... but because of chronic-early syndrome, I was there at 9:30am. That's EARLY (in my opinion). Yadda Yadda hamburgers (THREE) yadda. There was also excessive screaming.

ANYWAY, then I went to help Caroline move for the second day! Now she lives four flights up ... a trip which leaves me winded when I go up ONCE with no intention of coming back down within 3 hours. Which is why ANTICIPATING moving her is torture. And she's got a LOOOOT of stuff... including a bed and futon!! Crazy. But actually it isn't AS impossible as you'd imagine. I don't know how, but somehow the stairs, while definitely painful, don't become AS awful if you're making 7 trips up and down. I don't know why. Although this fact certainly doesn't seem to diminish the back pain the next morning (today). I considered the two day activity as my body's physical warm-up before it plunges back into regular activity. I considered the screaming at Splash to be the vocal warm-up. Get used to talking again!

After that, I came home (with so many martini glasses that Caroline gave me that I can make martinis... and smash them to the ground after every drink and probably still get pretty off (a practice I definitely wouldn't recommend... being drunk around smashed glasses)). Elena and I had tea and apples and soup. Then we went to a bingo/ice cream/ Tiffany's and Coach prizes night, for which we left at 9pm, although it started at 10.

Bingo is HIGH anxiety. I have no idea why it is intended for the elderly. Also, after I was over the anxiety because there was no way I was going to win, I got really sleepy. Plus, the guy calling out the numbers started sounding REALLY annoying to me. I was not alone it ANY of these feelings. Everyone at the table seemed to go through all those exact emotions-- anxiety, sleepy, and then pissed at the caller. He WAS really annoying though. He seemed to get really pissed off at all the people and then he just lost enthusiasm completely. We were like, "Jesus! This isn't THAT hard of a job, here! Settle down!"

Then I went home and passed out.

That's far too many activities for one day! I feel like I could spread that out over 3 weeks! And all of my days seem to be scheduled like that! Where are my three days in a row of neither seeing nor talking to anyone, watching movies all day long? Gone? Gone for the rest of my life!? Yeah...