Snippets of My Escape

I have, in no way, recovered. In fact, I am absolutely worse. I forget what my real voice sounds like. I am exceedingly resentful of the $50 non-cures, although I recognize that it's in the past. Puh!

I had to go to the Hillel today even though there are no classes. Expecting even less activity than usual, I brought Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris which I've been rereading merrily, AAND Ella Enchanted. I succumbed and read the latter. So, with a final looming on Thursday and another on Monday, I read and finished a children's book in.... 4 or 5 hours? And I took a 4 or 5 hour nap. I need to revise "all I can do is read a book to stay awake" to "all I can do is read a book, then fall asleep-- why choose between pleasures?" The book was delectable though. I kind of want to watch the movie, which I've never seen before. But I equally want to preserve the book in my head. When I gave the book to my sister a while ago, I thought I was bestowing a rare and heavenly gift upon her. She told me she thought it was "okay" and I judge her. I judge her so hard.

In other news, my L.A. trip has again devolved to uncertainty. My grandmother is now coming on the trip, and as a result, my mother says she might not come. Now I just want to go alone. I am the most over it ever.

I am ALSO over goodbyes. If Natalya was here, I would have the confidence to depart with a healthy "see ya" like I did in high school. Alone it seems thoughtless. With a partner, it's just quirky.